


i will see your face again (i am sure of it)

by makemelovely



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: F/F, Fluff and Angst, Reincarnation, Temporary Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-12
Updated: 2020-06-12
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:33:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24673159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/makemelovely/pseuds/makemelovely
Summary: Azula always comes back as a firebender. She can’t say the same for Ty Lee.//or, a tyzula reincarnation au
Relationships: Azula/Ty Lee (Avatar)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 234





	i will see your face again (i am sure of it)

Azula always comes back as a firebender. She can’t say the same for Ty Lee.

* * *

Azula smooths Ty Lee’s hair down, fondly twisting the ends into a braid. Ty Lee squirms in front of her, flexing her fingers and feeling the earth shift ever so subtly beneath their feet. “Settle yourself, love,” Azula reminds her briskly, her voice just the slightest bit soft, just a hint of tenderness slipping through her teeth. Azula isn’t one for pet names, but this is a necessary precautionary method. The taller girl has a million lifetimes nestled in her bones, gluing her together. She remembers all of them in some way. She can remember what Ty Lee’s hand had felt like when it ignited, their palms burning and fusing together, forged from fire. They had been strong together in that life. They had lived longer than they had in the one before. Ty Lee, sick and weak, and Azula too stubborn to cut her losses. Azula remembers the way Ty Lee’s breath had rattled around in her lungs, the unbearable wheezing, and she remembers holding Ty Lee’s dying body in the rain, her eyes overly bright and steam hissing in the air as the rain touched Azula’s burning skin.

Azula remembers too much and not enough all at once. She can recall perfectly what a sword in her chest feels like as well the way the blood had risen, unbidden in her throat, slick and shiny and suffocating. Azula knows what it’s like to die, but she cannot remember the name she was reborn with or the name Ty Lee was reborn with. It all flits in and out, recognition sparking in her bones and clarity reappearing at the oddest of times, her memory jogged by a touch or a word or the sensation of Ty Lee’s lips against hers.

It’s the oddest thing, to know nothing one instant and then everything the next.

Azula hates it.

Ty Lee pouts, her eyes catching Azula’s in the mirror. Azula struggles to conceal her vacant expression before Ty Lee notices it, but her girl is observant. Azula would be proud if it wasn’t so inconvenient for her. “What are you thinking about?” The smaller girl asks, tipping her head back.

It’s an act of trust, even if the other girl isn’t aware of it. Azula holds the weight of her head in her hands, and Ty Lee relaxes into Azula’s touch, surrendering to Azula’s will. The taller girl cradles Ty Lee’s head, palms pressing gently against her skull. If she wanted to, she could snap Ty Lee’s neck. It would be instant. It wouldn’t hurt. She wouldn’t try to hurt Ty Lee. Never her. Azula thinks of the way her brown eyes gleam in candlelight, and she wonders what she could accomplish in a lifetime without Ty Lee to hold her back, to weigh her down. Everybody has a weakness, and Ty Lee is Azula’s.

She has spent lifetimes protecting the other girl, seeking her out and letting fate lead her down whatever path it wishes. Azula would like to think she is just covering her bases, securing her one weakness in order to preserve her strength. It’s not that simple.

If Azula truly wanted to preserve her strength, she would kill Ty Lee. She doesn’t. She couldn’t. No, she could. She won’t. She wouldn’t. Instead, she protects her. She holds her head in her hands, feels the base of her skull and the fragility shifting just beneath the skin. She lets Ty Lee kiss her, her lips soft and gentle against Azula’s. She lets Ty Lee touch her, palm against her cheek, her touch tender and sweet. Awestruck and amazed. Worse, Azula leans into her touch.

If Azula wanted to be strong, she would kill the girl and be done with it. Wait for the next life and repeat. She can feel the potential trapped in her body, burning brightly in her lungs and glowing between each of her ribs. Azula could release it, but she won’t. Not at the cost of her life.

The thing is, Azula doesn’t know how many times she’ll come back. Every time she closes her eyes for the final time, she doesn’t know if she’ll see Ty Lee again. She doesn’t know why the thought scares her so badly.

“Hey?” Ty Lee reaches up, ghosting her knuckles along the underside of Azula’s jaw. Azula’s an excellent liar. She can fool anyone, even herself. She knows exactly why the thought of losing Ty Lee forever scares her. She’s always known. “Are you okay?”

Azula blinks the cobwebs away, smiling faintly down at Ty Lee. “Of course I’m okay.” She says primly, but she knows Ty Lee can see the mischievous gleam in her eyes. An excited tremor dances beneath her feet, but Azula is steady. She has to be. “I’m with you.” She flirts smoothly, or she tries.

Ty Lee’s whole face brightens, her eyes glowing and alight with joy. “Whatever, you big tease.” She laughs, the sound like bells in the wind.

Azula wants her to do it again and again and again. She leans down and captures Ty Lee’s lips between hers, kissing her firmly. She swallows the squeak Ty Lee makes, the other girl reaching up to hold Azula’s head in place. As if she planned on moving any time soon.

She has a lifetime to make Ty Lee laugh, and a lifetime to cut all of her laughter off with kisses. Quite the reward for the hard work she’d be inevitably putting in to make Ty Lee’s face crinkle up with joy.

She has less than a week.

In five days, the small earth village they are residing in will be invaded by one of the fire nation’s raiding teams. Ty Lee will die in her arms, pale and shaking and weeping, begging to stay, to just stay with Azula for a little while longer.

Here is Azula’s curse: sometimes Ty Lee will remember her. Sometimes she will look into Azula’s eyes and recognize every her she’s ever been. That’s how Azula knows she’s going to die. Ty Lee never remembers Azula until it’s too late.

Ty Lee will die, body going cold and limp in Azula’s arms. And Azula?

Azula will burn the world down around her until the flame within her flickers and she is reborn.

* * *

At first, Azula kept a mental log of each of her lives, her strengths and weaknesses as well as common occurrences. The only thing linking them all together was Ty Lee.

If Azula were someone else, she might pretend that she has never known what it feels like to end Ty Lee’s life, to bloody her hands and feel the slickness days after she committed the act.

Azula knows the ins and outs of mourning clothes, each garb fitting into different times and places with ease. The first time Azula kills Ty Lee, she stops hungering for blood on her hands. For the first time, she has been sated. For the first time, her bloodlust has lessened.

She’s not a comedian, but she supposes that there’s some sort of cosmic humor and irony tied up together. The first time she’s recoiled at the sight of blood, the first time she’s regretted her choices. A real regret, bone deep and aching. The first time she hasn’t been able to push past it.

Oh, she tried. The following three lives were spent in the same agonizing grief, her moods erratic and unpredictable. A loneliness so tangible it physically aches, and a depression so acute it stings.

She makes a vow then to never kill Ty Lee again.

It’s not worth the trouble it causes.

* * *

“I missed you!” Ty Lee cheerfully declares, throwing herself at Azula. Azula catches her with ease, smiling fondly, easily.

In this life, Azula’s firebending is unremarkable. It is plain and weak, completely ordinary. Ty Lee’s is much more advanced, her fire tinging blue if she focuses hard enough. Part of Azula is bitter and resentful, but she does her best to smother it with pride.

She’s been successful for the most part, even if the sight of Ty Lee’s blue flames make her heart pang. 

She misses being powerful, but she thinks she misses Ty Lee’s admiring gaze far more. She can’t exactly impress Ty Lee now being as weak as she is.

If Azula could will herself to be strong, she would. In this life, she cannot.

Azula smiles, the edge of her lips curving up for a quick grin that makes Ty Lee’s eyes sparkle. “I missed you, too.” She leans forward, brushing her lips gently against the smaller girl’s.

Ty Lee laughs, leaning up on the tips of her toes. “You call that a kiss?” She challenges, darting up to wrap her arms around Azula’s neck, yanking her down to kiss her passionately.

Azula pulls away, breathless and flushed. “Decorum, dearest.” She teases, pulling away and swallowing the flurry of emotions rising in her throat.

“I suppose you’re right.” Ty Lee sighs, reaching out and twining their fingers together. Azula marvels at the smoothness of her skin, the way their fingers lace together as well as their palms pressed together.

Azula swings their linked hands between them, smirking when Ty Lee smiles, a melted, love struck sort of smile. “I wish I wasn’t.” She says, almost apologetically.

Ty Lee flashes her a guilty look. If she wasn’t an important politician, they’d be living somewhere secluded, quiet. Somewhere safe. Unfortunately, Ty Lee is needed by more than just Azula.

“Oh, don’t look so downtrodden. Allow me to put a smile on your face.” Azula says, glancing around and tugging Ty Lee off course.

“Where are we going?” She asks, glancing behind her in confusion.

“You’ll see.” Azula tells her, smiling mysteriously.

Ty Lee flicks her eyes longingly towards their house, no doubt anticipating the bath she was planning on taking. “But it’s almost dark.” She points out.

Azula ignores her, taking her down to a small pond on the edge of their property. The sun sinks below the horizon and the moon takes its place, casting silvery gleams of light on all it touches.

“What are we doing?” Ty Lee furrows her brows, glancing curiously around.

“Dance with me.” Azula holds her hand out, palm facing the night sky.

Ty Lee’s grin is brighter than any star could ever hope to be. “You’re such a sap.” Her voice is drenched in affection, warmth radiating from her eyes as she takes Azula’s hand.

They dance in the light of the moonlight, Azula holding her close, bodies pressed together and hearts beating in unison.

For the first time in a long time, Azula feels content. For the first time, Azula lets herself hope.

It was a mistake, of course. Hope is for fools.

Ty Lee dies a month later. A trip to a neighboring village gone wrong. Azula hears about it after it is all over, after Ty Lee has died and Azula’s light has gone with her.

She was stupid for thinking they could make it, that they could live a happy life for once.

Girls like Azula aren’t built like that.

They aren’t made for happy endings.

Azula just feels bad for Ty Lee. How unfortunate for her to be the object of her affections, the apple of her eye. Ty Lee who should get to be happy, who should live a long, peaceful life of contentment.

If only Azula could let her. If only Azula could let herself let go.

* * *

When Azula is born as herself again, her mother meets her eyes and sees everything. All of her lives laid bare, all of the blood and destruction and the sharp joy she gained from it. She sees Azula’s bloody hands and Ty Lee’s body, and puts the puzzle pieces together.

Maybe she doesn’t see the grief and the self hatred present in every one of Azula’s lives, or maybe she just ignores it.

Azula will never know.

What she does know, is this: Azula’s mother looks at her and sees a monster. If it walks like a turtle duck, if it acts like a turtle duck and all that. She calls it like she sees it.

Azula wishes she could blame her, but she sees the life drain from Ty Lee’s pretty brown eyes and she can’t help but agree. So she submerges herself in her father’s expectations and his meager attempts at affection. It is little more than manipulation, but Azula has been waiting for her name to become her own again so she ignores it. A price has to be paid, after all.

In this life, Azula is powerful. She is strong and smart and steady. Her power is innate, unlike her brother Zuko’s power. He has to learn it, has to work for it. Azula’s is instinctive and she likes that.

Likes it so much that she allows her father to shape her in his image until the flames of her bitterness and resentment has been stoked, and her vicious nature is in full force.

Azula never lied about her cruel streak. She’s just allowed others to soften it. In this life, she’ll use it to keep herself safe. She’ll keep Ty Lee safe, too.

Pure intentions and a mask that won’t be discarded so easily never mix well.

But nothing about Azula has ever been pure. Monstrosity, and all that comes with it.

Still, she never expected to get as far in this life as she had. There’s something different about this life. Everybody is here. Zuko and Mai and especially Ty Lee. They are all together in this life. Something important is coming, Azula’s sure of it.

Then, the Avatar reappears.

Zuko is as much of a failure in this life as he was in the one three cycles ago. Ty Lee is the one that surprises her. She runs off to join the circus, but luckily that freak show helped hone her fighting abilities.

Azula can be grateful for that, at the very least.

In the beginning, Azula had a plan. She and Ty Lee were supposed to be the great romance of the era, star crossed and everything that it entails, but the Avatar and his little waterbender seem determined to steal the title from them.

Her plans changed, evolved. They all kind of came apart when Ty Lee betrayed her.

In all of their lives, Ty Lee has never stabbed Azula in the back. Never. Azula wonders what kind of damage the Avatar caused to this life, and she wonders if it’s reversible.

Losing Ty Lee sends her on a downward spiral, paranoia and instability tearing at her from all angles. Zuko loses to her, but somehow she’s the one who ends up imprisoned in a mental hospital, begrudgingly attending therapy sessions and tearing at the bars of her cell.

Eventually, Azula gets a clean bill of health from her therapist. Well, enough of a clean bill that they’re releasing her as long as she continues therapy.

When she leaves, she finds Ty Lee waiting for her, dressed in green and grinning nervously. “Hi, Azula!” She says tentatively, her voice three octaves higher and her hands wringing together.

“Hello, dearest.” Azula says, partly to spite her, and partly in the hopes that Ty Lee will remember, that maybe this is the life they will make it.

Ty Lee’s brows furrow for a moment before they smoothen out, recognition gleaming in her shiny brown eyes. “Oh, Azula,” she breathes, flinging herself at Azula.

Azula catches her and hugs her tightly, tears springing up in her eyes. Ty Lee clings to her, cheeks wet with tears as she babbles apologies and declarations of affection and love against her neck.

Azula runs her fingers through Ty Lee’s hair, savoring the solidity of her in Azula’s arms.

She lets herself believe that they’ll make it. That this will be the last life she’ll search for Ty Lee in, and it’ll be the best one yet.

It has to be.

There’s no other time but now.

**Author's Note:**

> hi if ur interest my tumblr is @makemelovely and my twitter is @tyzulafilms


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